Reassurance

Ah hello world. Just another pointless blog very few people are going to read. Today I wana apologize for what I said in the previous blog kinda bashing Seth. I feel a little stupid for jumping to so many conclusions about him. He really does care for me. Hes just not quick to show it like I'm used to. And I suppose if we had some alone time hed show it more. But you never know..maybe I just havent been with him long enough to really understand like I always think i do. This yellow is straining my eyes >.<. blehh. Oh well. Anyway, I can't help feeling like theres guna b a point where hes just guna unleash what he actually does feel for me sometime soon. I guess you never know..short blog today..

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moonlightshadows12*~

A Call For Help

I know no one ever reads my blogs. And nobody cares what I have to say. But the real reason I blog is just to vent whatever feelings happen to come across my mind. I feel as if Seths not telling me something..like theres something everyone else knows that I dont..almost like hes upset with me but won't admit it. He's constantly hurting and reassuring me..off and on..so..is there really something wrong? or is he just bipolar?I dont even know what to think anymore..he complains about not getting to spend any time with me..but when I'm with him he ignores me like I'm invisible...and he wont listen when I tell him anything..so ive discovered I have to have others tell him for me just so hell get the slightest hint...I'm not sure if he loves me or not..he surely doesnt show it often..I'm just not sure what to do..I can usually see right through people..and with him I thought i could..last week..but he didnt leave me like i thought..so maybe I'm just looking past whats really there..maybe hes just upset..but i cant stand this worrying every second..after reassurance I'm fine..but then he turns around and makes me wonder again..I've never been so puzzled...So if anyones out there..anyone who could help with my situation that might read this..comment or message me..please..thank you..

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moonlightshadows12*~

JROTC

Today, I had to wear my JROTC uniform for the first time. To be honest its rly uncomfortable =). I prefer to keep my hair down usually..so its strange for me to be wearing it in a bun. I look really snazzy. but at the same time i think if i wasn't wearing the drill team jacket id look like a super nerd. so drill team is good ^^;;. Everytime I think of ROTC i think miltary and so it makes me wana listen to superchick 0.0. I wish i had a rank. I kinda hate being a let I because for one thing I am nothing. No rank. No awards. Nothing. All thats pinned on my uniform is the schools emblem and a star. The star just means we have a unit of honor. I'm going to apply for my academic wreath to go around the star soon, but thats sooner. Also I'm hoping I'll get a skirt soon. These pants are not only unflattering but rly quite uncomfortable. Well, theres not much else for to say about it. it DOES look snazzy...even though i cant kiss Seth in it >.>. I mean berry to mint =D. Anyway, Love you all my beautiful readers. (yes i love u ugly ppl ur beautiful)

This Is The Hidden Realityy
~*Moonlightshadows12*~

Another Brain Teaser

ll-ll-llllll lllllllll-llllll-llllllll lllllll-lll-ll-lll llllllll-llll-llll-lllllll? lllllll-llllll-llllll-lll-llllll-llllll-lll lllllll-lllllll-lll-ll-llll-ll-lllll llllllll-ll-llllllll-llll-llll-llllllll llllll-lll llll-llllll-lllllllll llllllll-llllll lll-llllll llllllll-llll-llll-lllllll. llllllll-lll-lll-llll-lll-lll


Harder then the last one now isn't it?

I Trust You

Today i'd like to share the topic of trust. Trust..is knowing a person is faithful and honest and sincere....love is trust. Back some time ago I had trust issues..people had trust issues with me in fact, but it screwed my life up quite a bit back there. With Seth, theres not rly any trust issues...i just wonder if I'm moving to fast..so fast that he may..take advantage of what i do for him. If anyones been in this situation tell me. I dont want to stop doing wat i am..or even slow down..but i want to make myself truly trust him enough to the point where I know he wont take me for granted. So..do I really trust him. I really want to. I think I do. I think I'm just overreacting. He loves me. I think I'm just overanalyzing the whole situation. I just wish..i could have one night with him..if it were possible..just lay with him under the stars..just to talk and be in love and truly KNOW the feeling of true real trust. I've never let myself know it...maybe I don't need a night with him..maybe i just need to let go of my caution..maybe hes different from my undeniable past. You know what..I think thats what i really need to do. So Seth if you're reading this..I'm sorry if u ever thought i didnt trust you. Because I do. I'm just a cautious overanalyzing gf. thanks for being my perfect guy.


This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moonlightshadows12*~

hope

He.is.wonderful. thats all there is to it...i just cant shut up about it..hes just so awesome..am i obsessed? probably a wee bit..but...i havent been this in love since..what 6th grade? my only problem is that my grades r slipping..im going to lose my phone..and not b able 2 tlk 2 him..but..itll blow over in time right? hes thinking about moving back in with his dad and switching schools..i know hed b happier living there..but im worried hell meet another girl and dump me..after all that is wat happened with the last girl only i was the new girl..but anyway...i hope life will turn out alright..hope for me

Homecoming 2010

Homecomings tommorow!!!! and i am uber excited!! Annnnd Seth is so totally nice that hes paid for everything..actually he wont LET me pay for anything. and hes taking me to the most expensive restaurant in my home town 0.0. I've never been so spoiled. He's so nice ^//^. I'm the same dress from my 7th grade year because were poor. But its alright because oddly enough its purple..and ul never guess whos favorite color tht is. XP. (actually now that i mention it im glad i didnt get that one from my aunt...) Sorry yesterday's blog was so short. We had to go commerce on the field and watch a bunch of chicks try 2 play football =). annnnd I got in trouble with sergeant T.T...for those of you who dont know im in JROTC. and sergeant caught seth kiss me. yeaaa i slapped him a few THOUSAND times. But anyway back to homecoming..the theme this year is "forever tonight". Ok sooo..is that rly a theme? I mean dont get me wrong but most school do stuff like "under the sea" or "a night in the stars"..at least as far i know.."forever tonight"..huh..i suppose it sounds romantic..and i do love the idea of romance ^//^ so ill take it. Just thinking about it tho...not very many ppl read my blog. But if you ARE reading it arigato ^-^. if not...well hmph! but err..how could u know i said hmph if ur not reading..hmm..well still! hmph! Lets hope homecoming goes great!!

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moonlightshadows12*~