Love Can Cure

Today my body has just been feeling...odd. This morning i had a blur in my eye that wouldnt go away. Starting in 2nd pd i got a massive headache. and just in skill 10 min ago my hand just went numb and i didnt know why O.O. I came back to my blog and read the comment my good friend Tiffy-chan left on yesterdays blog. (2nd blog). It made me smile and forget about all my illnesses of today. Just the sheer belief in love. Just the way she told of how much J loves me made me think of him. and it calmed my headache a little. Its still pounding in the right side of my head. But if its like he usual headaches i get it should go away after lunch..at least i hope so..And I must say you are absolutely right tiffy-chan =). ahh...*clenches head*..it hurts...it might be because this just isnt my favorite time of month T~T. That or somethings wrong with my brain..of course alot of ppl think that about me. I showed yesterdays bog to a good friend..who i must say is quite jealous. He was upsetted by it. He couldnt read it. Two lines in and he felt sick. Wow. I gess love can do both cure and infect. But Im serious. My head is throbbing right now. It hurts so bad...I almost called home. But I cant for 2 reasons. A girl never abandons her blog! and moms at work. And also. Im torturing myself with it. I have earbuds in because i cant live wihout music. Even though it hurts so bad. I know though that if i get a message from my J-sama itll calm down again. (Also J..Bobby told me why u were in the hospital..*cracks up lmao*)oww myyy heeaddddddddd TT~TT...Readers. Youre lucky to know that I sneak in here everyday during intramurals just to type for you. AND with a headache. LOVE ME. lol.

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden*~

For you

For my love. An add-on to todays blog. You are my life. I will never stop loving you. Believe in us with all your heart and we will stay together until the end of time and beyond. I hate what the world is doing to us. It truly kills me inside. 3 years and we will be free. At least you will be my love. 4 years for me. "I was born to tell you I love you. and I am torn to do what I have to to make you mine..stay with me tonight." the most beautiful lyrics ive heard in quite a while. And i know theyre true more then anything for us. And i cant help how ambitious our love makes me feel. So curious like a child. yet so worried like someone waiting in the hospital for a loved one. I know youre doing the best you can. And all I can do is pray for you. I do more then anyone Ive ever prayed for. I told my mother about your parents hatred for me. Ive found some good in my mother at this point. She agreed with me that you arent treated right. We WILL find a way...if they will let you please write me. I have but 1 stamp left so im saving it for something special. I feel magical for some reason lately. Like I know I can make something happen for us. something that will change your familys opinion. Something extraoridinary. I just havent thought of it yet. So my love. I will begin writing poetry for our book as well. you and I have got our lives ahead of us and Im not going to let your parents ruin that for you. You are my true knight in shining armour and i thank you so much for everything you do for me. So for you my love. I will do my best to think of a plan. Think of a way to get you out of this. For the hidden world to see us in love is like a movie almost. I wonder how many random people read these and feel strongly for what were going through. I wonder alot of things. But one thing i already know the answer to is that I know well be together forever no matter what. i was lucky to have this extra comp time in spanish so i could type this message. This is a note to the world. A note to anyone with a true love and a true heart. A reminder that love is real. And the purest form is found in the hearts of young people. Pure love,pure curiosity, pure perfection. Perfection adults enjoy destroying. I was wondering where my mind was today. Now we know Im a better write after lunch *giggles*. Before my dedication to you gets to long I should go. I have much to say but Ive probably already said too much. I love you my darling. Stay with me. We WILL make it.

This Has Been MY Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden....for you*~

Flying Solo

Ok so this year I am going to be the school talent show for the 1st time since 5th grade. Im singing. By myself. *insert hyperventilation here* . I am singing the solo version of Defying Gravity by Idina Menzel from the extraordinarily incredible musical Wicked. If you have never heard of Wicked go google it RIGHT NOW! lolz so yea Im nervous. Very nervous. Very very very very nervous. Wouldnt anyone be a bit scared to be on stage singing an epic song in front of the entire school and worse..my mother. Mother tends to get too excited when I perform in ANYTHING. Even in baand concerts she sits in the audience staring at me with the most annoying obnoxious smile. I mean dont get me wrong i love my mommy (XD) but shes rly annoying with all that. I do not need to b concentrated on or watched like a hawk in any situation. Also Mr. JAH is going to be there. Watching me. O.O. *insert more hyperventilation here* Isnt it nervous-making enough when your mother is watching and now your bf? O.O omg ima guna esplode. and seriously google the gir mad hatter thingy its the shiz. Im sitting by a friend by the initials of IRD. I have just introduced him to blogger and so far his blog isnt very successful..considering he just posted his 1st post lol. Check out his blog if you want. He goes by the name of souleater12. somebody just screamed here at school. i have a feeling it was just one of the teachers that saw a mouse or something. poor creatures. They scare people so much when they really are harmless. Im sorry if this blog is kind of random and disappointing as i hope you know Im female and this is not my chosen week T~T. well its lunch. Ciao everyone

Yourself

ok so today we were talking about how people are sometimes not themselves at school. How the act different for some reason. I personally think its because people arent given the to chance to be themselves. Todays youth is sat in rows and being force-fed knowledge. We dont really get to show anyone how we really feel without getting detention or worse for it. Like me, I would rather not say alot of my thoughts out loud at school because they would probably offend someone. Therefore people think im quiet. Also I actually have a decent singing voice. I dont really sing in front of people so people think i cant sing. Well ill be proving that point wrong this May actually in the talent show. Also kids are so affected by reputation they hide things about themselves to prevent fights, being made fun of, or simply not fitting in. Fitting in is a stupid concept to me. I am myself. Just nobody cares to find out.Wierd is who i am. I have no idea why people have to fit in to be happy. I prefer living a llife of happiness rather then popularity. But yea anyway. Ive discovered the act of really acting like yourself isnt your decision. Its what people make out of you. Its your reputation and the way you react to things. Im sorry this blog is probably going to turn out short. I actually dont have very much time today with all the distractions. So I shall follow out with the Wednesday Randomness. Potato. OMG MAD HATTER GIR!!! lolz google that. Love you all bye byeee.

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden*~

The Bipolar Witch

Ok,so today I wana talk about one of this mornings mishaps with someone who is supposedly my friend. We were in band all nice n mellow and what-not when whats-her-face id ranting to another girl about...how basically someone else plays saxophone better then her. I come over and try and calmly tell her they both have great potential and are both good players. She looks at me as if I'd just told her biggest secret and replies with "YOU! SHUT UP AND GO AWAY YOU'RE NOT HELPING!" and then says the same to another girl trying to explain the same concept to her. Ok so heres the part thats got me wondering..why??!! yes we ALL know you're bipolar..trust me ive known you 9 years. But rly? blow off logic for rage? Thats just..im sorry but thats just stupid. If anyone out there has met anyone like this they cannot be as bad as her. I dont even know what to call a person like this. But if I had to name her id simply call her no good. Anyone who thinks theyre better then everyone else and gets mad when someone simply tries to tell them were all equal is a bit selfish maybe? heh..also..unless youre close to me or if i ask u to, i hate wen ppl touch me T~T. This morning I unknowingly had a small streak of eyeliner under my eye. she INSISTS on removing it for me so just suddenly starts touching my face. If youre close to me at all you know I HATE when people touch my nose. Guess who touched my nose T~T. So afterward I went out into the hall to talk to my good buddy DMC. We now have an inside joke about it XP. *pokes her face* DID I CURE UR UGLINESS YET!? OH NOEZ YOURE STILL BETTER THEN ME LET ME FIX IT!!! lolz its quite entertaining. Another thing. I only let one person touch my belly button..one person lol. and he should feel privelidged for that! lol! just thought id throw that out there lol. Ok i promised myself I wouldnt make this blog so long but I cant help it! arg! questions or comments below! Love and Hugs and Too much time on my hands!

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden*~

Intentional Rudeness

Alrighty so here I am. I almost thought I wouldnt get to post a blog today because the internet was down all morning. But thanks to Cassies dad and his cooly cool fixit skizzles it works! ok enough bad gangsta talk. Today I wana talk about how people are intentionally rude. Its like prejudice..only stupider.. ._. ...uhm yea. Its like they dont even WANT a chance to get to know you but yet they instantly decide you're a bad influence. I could think of a couple people. I know they're just trying to protect their child but A-a stepparent isnt a real parent..i learn from experience. and B-What if someone new in their life could make them happy? hm? you ever think happiness could be more successful then success? (yo J u gave me ideas lol) I also dont understand why these people find so much flaw in me when I try and try to be as nice and polite as i possibly can around them. T~T..Its not like im aan illmannered barbarian. I can be distracting, but don't blame me for the unsuccessful behavior of another. you know? And also if having a person you love in your life is so unsuccessful I'd like to know why people get married? hmm? oh what because they're 18 and they supposedly "know what their doing"? Well as a matter of fact some very close friends and I are quite a bit smarter then most adults. And I believe we "know what were doing" just as much as you do. And so if we think you can be in love and still be successful then LET US THINK! We all have our own thoughts for a reason! We just simply find a person who thinks the same thought and suddenly theres something wrong with us! hmph..I believe strongly that true love exists. And that no grade or test can change love. Success is a different story. But if you have your true love, thats 10 times better then being successful. You could be a billioinaire and a CEO of a major company and if thats what you love so be it. But that sounds boring as Hell to me and so Id rather be with the one I love. Even if that means working minimum wwage for the rest of my life. Ill fight for my love. But dont call me a bad influence. Because i got a feeling more then half of this world would agree. Love is love. Dont torment it. Let it be. Let it flow. Let it thrive and LET..IT..LIVE. questions or comments below. that is all. And for my true love..Good luck with everything tonight. Just let them know you deserve me.

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden*~

Creativity Is A Gift

It's Friday. The week is coming to an end. which means there probably wont be a blog tomorrow or Sunday. =( But feel free to comment. OK! Today I want to talk about creativity. Sadly in todays society, not many people are still creative T~T. And people who dont even try? oh lord why are u even doing it then! In fact there are to young ladies who also play clarinet in my band. They hate it and don't even try to learn their music. THEN WHY ARE YOU IN BAND PEOPLE!??....nyerg..i got frustrated already..watch out for me today guys...Another thing. There are so many wonderful young artist out there. And then again, we have those kind of people who hav not a spec of creativity and will probably end up living a life of being a soccor mom living in a suberb and naming their kids generic names and marrying a dude named Bob. booorrriiinnnnnngggg. Personally I want to live in a house PARTICULARLY with double stair cases like u see in movies. I have no idea why. I've just always loved that. And I want to marry a guy named..well..ill say his initials are JAH. And I want to name my kids Dmitri and Ella. Yes I already know. Is that wierd? Anyway i think thats a bit more creative then wat most people have in mind for their futures. Creativity is just..such a huge part of my life. I sing,I draw,I design...I can't imagine how a person could live without it. But people like that are everywhere...in fact I hav a..well i wouldnt exactly call him a friend..more like a leech..who is THE most boring person ive EVER met. Well say his initals are TGD. Seriously, I cannot stand his hideous boringness!! We once had a conversation where he thought maltodextrin was a city. Yes. Seriously. On top of his trying to fit in and hated reputation he is stupid. Its just people like that who disgust me! I cant stand to be around someone with no imagination!! (and yes Mr. APD you do have an imagination)Just people who move strictly with the crowd instead of moving for their own minds. Blugh. Another thing is i really wana know just how the neanderthals we call jocks can tell you exactly how to make a touchdown but dont know the difference between a sketchbook and copy paper. This is getting long...suppose I should stop ranting? Love and Hugs and So much time on my hands idk wat 2 do with it.

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden*~

Risk

Ok today,I have double intramurals and have waaaay too much time on my hands so excuse me. This might be a long one. What is it about risk thats so...intriguing? so thrilling. You really want something but your afraid something will go wrong. You hate it,you worry about it, but you love it. But why? Is it because it doesnt happen often? Or because...risk is..risk? Also, risk is extremly hard to resist. Risking being killed to be with the one you love. You want so strongly to resist it but you can't. Because you know you're supposed to be with that person. On the other hand there are things that are just plain stupid. Like trying to rob a gun store.(wow..that was an interesting simile XD) You walk in,and hold a gun to the clerk..only finding hes pointing a gun back at you. Real nice. Why do people even take idiotic risks like that? dares? trying to make yourself look good? attention? I say anyone who would ever think to b that dumb was certainly raised on bad influence. I believe being a teen is about taking risks and doing things you can only do now or never. But not things you know have instant consequences with the bare fact that theres no chance of succeeding but only risking it for your 5 minutes of fame. We take risks we dont even realize half the time. They may not be dangerous but we do. Everytime we get in a car, bus, train, plane, boat, or vehicle of any sort we risk crashing dont we? Life is actually full of risks. omg ive still got 30 min in here. Well ill try and decorate some. Dont wana fry ur braincells too much without some pretty colors. XP Love and Hugs and WAAAAAY too much time on my hands,


This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden*~

The Wednesday Randomness..with some seriousness

Today I would like to speak on a few topics and an extremly meaningful quote from Anne frank. "Despite of it all, I still believe people are good at heart." I agree with her on this one. Unless you are mentally insane or had a bad experience you need 2 seek revenge for, you probably wouldnt do the manical things following in any footsteps of Mr. Hitler. Well, I guess u could be trying to act cool in front of someone,but in todays society all youre going to get is jail time. Topic number two. America is free. Or is it? We are told we cannot be in love with the person we are destined to be with...because of our age. How young people supposedly "don't know" what love is...Im well aware ive gone on rants and rants on this topic in my old blog. But I just cannot get over the fact that America is just a..HYPOCRICY!..*slaps self*.. o.o ..im good..im good..but ya kno it just burns me up. Ok and one random moment thingy thing of silliness here XP.(I promised I'd squeeze this in) I MADE A NEW FRIEND! YAR HAR HAR..im..not a pirate..But i made i new friend =D i did i did. (TEEHEE) Now. Also to anyone who read this from animemizu,i love and miss u all! hope to be back soon!..NOW..its serious time..those poor coal miners..OMG i cannot be serious now! Look what yall made me do!!! I just feel random..so i shall name this post appropriately XP.bye bye

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden*~

Unworthy Criticism

Otay, today i shall speak on the topic of criticism. In my response to criticism i simply tell the person they are criticising me and/or someone else..... ._. ...am i right? I am constantly criticized for the way i dress,act, and the people i generally tend to befriend. Another is my belief in reincarnation. People are telling me all the time I'm going to go to Hell for even thinking the thoguht it might be true. And that I'm satanic...and that I'm a witch...But that doesnt matter because that is what I choose to believe in. If I am being criticized I can usually ignore it. However if a person is able to come up with something extremely hurtful and down right absurd I can't contain myself and fly off the handle in rants.(heh..fair warning for future blogs)One thing totally overwhips my cream though.(lolol)That is when a person is criticizmic and has no reasoning behind the act. A person simply doesn't like you...because they don't like you...uhm yea..someone wana help me out on that one? I mean seriously if ur just guna b like.."duhhh i dont like your face..cuz its..YOUR face." Get a life. If youre going to be a critic all your life at least make a career out of it. blugh. Things like this just plain anger me. When people are so STUPID!..uh..erm..*deep breath* I suppose I'm getting ahead of myself. Anywaaaay. I don't want to make this blog too long but if you think I need 2 add more comment it. Love and hugs and too much time on my hands. =D

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden*~

Esoteric

For this entry I decided to use blue. For the favorite color of someone very speshal XP. Today I'd like to speak on the topic of esotercism. The word "esoteric" can have different meanings depending on just how modestly you use it. If you were to say everyone was esoteric that could only mean that everyone is ununderstandable in their own way. However if you mean to say only people who can do unreal things (magicians,hypnotists,etc.) are esoteric, that would be an extremely inopen way to put it. I however believe I am esoteric. Not many understand me. There are probably two people on this entire Earth who can really get inside my head and understand me completely. Two very speshal people indeed. (dont wonder why i spell speshal like that..i just like it that way.) Both of these people are VERY esoteric as well. One is the person who means the most to me. Another, The only person in existance that I believe could possibly rule the world. As for the true meaning of the word "esoteric",A dictionary would probably say: Confined to and understandable by only an enlightened inner circle. But just who is truly said to be esoteric?? I have thought and thought and fried my brain to the point of fatigue with this impediment of my mind. I want to consider myself significantly esoteric but my mind wants to consider EVERYONE esoteric. I think too much. I have simply become a nerd. I told a friend this and he simply inquired that i'm a "sexy nerd". Maybe i AM esoteric. well lunch ..toodles.

This Is The Hidden Reality
~*Moon.Is.Hidden*~

The Dangerous Love

In my old blog I would constantly speak of how love is love. Well...i still do that. Only this time its in a different way. Before it was all about the authorities telling us who we should and shouldnt b allowed to love. This time however is about how the one who loves you the most can be the most dangerous. Is it bad if the person who has loved u since u met has driven you to the point of leaving them? I truthfully didnt want to leave him really..hes just simply irritating and obsessed. Besides that point I do have a guy im positive i do love. The first guy however would not shut up or accept the fact i was in love with someone else. I want to escape him. My love for him has honestly faded with all his actions. This obviously means he and I do not have unconditional love..and thats why I want to escape. I am happy with this other guy and for the first time in quite a while I will only have one love in my life. Other then this, theres another guy who loves me. @.@ (TOO MANY STALKERS!! BLARGH!!) He however revolves around my happiness and would accept my wishes of anything i choose to do. But it makes me feel guilty because he does truly care for me so much. I gotta run..lunchtime..

This is The Hidden Reality
~.Moon.Is.Hidden.~

The Truth and the beginning

The truth of this hidden blog is to show the world just what happened...when my father found my secret because of my stupidity. I had a blog by the name of Honest to Blog...however I was a bit too honest..i had posted my full real name and photo..i posted my blog to facebook because i was so triumphantly proud of my words. With this i was awfully forgetful that my father was one of my facebook friends. He called me just 2 days after Honest to Blog was created...I was deleted from facebook, Honest to Blog was deleted. My Myspace i never used was deleted. As was anything else my mother could remember. Im now in the shadows. My blog is a secret. and this is a lesson i give to any others who choose to freely speak of their beliefs online without interference. DO NOT..let you father read your blog. unless u have a really cool dad..*cough*luckyass .>.>...

This Is The Hidden Reality
~.Moon Is Hidden.~